somewhere in between...

charlie brown, the great philosopher, once stated, "what we need in life are more hellos and fewer goodbyes." i agree...goodbyes make me sad, too, charlie brown...

but life is full of experiences that have hellos and goodbyes built in...in fact the biggest milestones of life are usually events that have both a hello and goodbye in the same experience...graduation, birth, marriage, promotions, moving, and dying...these are the experiences that stretch our emotions, that make us face two strong, diametrical feelings...

but the most important part of these hello-goodbye adventures is what's in the middle...what happens between the beginning and the end is what makes the real difference...the middle is where the meat of life is...timing automatically gives us the hellos and the goodbyes...but it is up to us to sculpt the middle in such a way that the starts and finishes are divinely justified...

a middle needs a sense of purpose big enough to include God and wide enough to include mankind...a middle needs a purpose that takes us beyond ourselves and challenges us to make life good for other people...

a middle needs to rid itself of the question, "what can i get out of this experience?" replace it with this question: "what can i bring to this life experience that will enrich others?" a middle requires hard work and commitment...it needs imagination and courage for each day, so that when we come to the end, the goodbye...we can exit the experience with a song of thanksgiving and a sense of accomplishment...

then as we are suspended in time, hanging between a yesterday and a tomorrow, we can make a half-turn into the next hello with anticipation and hope...

freedom is not the right to do what we want but the power to do what we ought...
~ corrie ten boom

the world ain't all sunshine and rainbows...

The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! - Rocky

my friend had this as their update on facebook today...i read it like 7 times...just to really let it sink in...

life does hit hard at times...how are you going to handle it? are you going to let it rip you to shreds? or...will you rise from it...no matter how difficult...no matter how slowly...no matter how unstable...

if you don't move on...you miss out on the lessons...you miss out on the strengthening...you miss out on everything else waiting for you to experience...

in my past...it was not until i was able to pick myself up...one wobbly step after another...and start moving...towards something new...it was only then...that i was able to look back at whatever crippled me for a while...and learn from it...or take from it what i needed to...

but most of all...it wasn't until then...that i was able to embrace all the good surrounding me outside the pain...

tears...

as most of the people in my life can attest to...i am a crier...

it is true...i have a very quick tear reflex - at least that's how i like to refer to it...
i have been known to cry at movies...commercials (the hallmark ones especially) sad and happy moments...

i can watch any two beings (animals, humans, friends, enemies - it doesn't matter) in a scene where one is saying good-bye to the other, and i will cry every single time...

happiness always sets me off...many times...as i'm crying...people have wondered...shouldn't she be happy? the thing is...i was...and crying was the only response that came to me...

of course, i do an outstanding job of sad tears...when someone suggests going to a movie...my first thought is...does the movie have sad parts...i do myself and everyone else a huge favor by staying out of sad movies...the movies that evoke hard sobs...not a good sight...those movies are best reserved for me solo...in the privacy of my own home...

i have noticed that some of my friends use my tears vicariously...some have been brought up with the notion that you should not cry...or at least not publically...many times they have looked at me in a tearful situation and said, almost hopefully, "are you going to cry?" i guess if i really thought about it...i was brought up that way...the problem with me...was that even if i wanted to not cry...i had little ability to stop the rainfall...

but i have learned that tears are nothing to be ashamed of...in fact, i am rather proud that i can feel so deeply about things...and, more important, people who know how to cry also are the people who know how to laugh...the self-control that shields a person from tears is the same control that secures the emotions against being open to laughter...

i can't speak for everyone who cries...but for me tears come from a well of joy deep within my being...not always happiness, but genuine joy...happiness is somthing people invented - a happy day, a happy event...but joy is something very different...joy comes from deep within...joy is such a wonderful surprise welling up so unexpectedly...well...it just makes me cry...

tears are a vital cleansing element in a woman's life...it helps you know you are still alive and in true touch with your deep well of joy...

friends who walk beside me...

few journeys are a solitary walk...even though i cherish my moments alone...i draw the most strength from being with people...other people nurture me, encourage me, draw me out of my doldrums, and give me courage...

God made us to be social creatures...He created us for sharing, for reaching out, and for drawing close...the most profound meanings in life come in the process of loving and being loved...

i think about the friends i have in my life...most of my friends...when i first see them...we start the visit with a big hug...then we get down to business sharing aches and pains...then we move to the good times coming up...

i think of good friends who hold my hand and tell me what a good job i'm doing...i think about my friends who challenge me and nudge me out of my pity party and back into real life...i think of the friends who bring me soup and medicine when i am sick...and the friends who call and say, "i was just thinking about you today...how are things?"

i certainly think about the cherished friends in my life who on a weekly basis...we have made it a point to sustain each other...i think about my friends who do not live close; we only talk every few months or so...but i feel their presence and hold every memory close...

how lonely the walk would be without my many wonderful friends...they enrich my steps...they hold me up when the going gets rough and join in my chorus when my skies are blue...

ch ch ch changes...

i had a very deep discussion with a friend of mine on change...

we both came to the conclusion that a life with no changes from day to day is a sobering thought...

change is good...change is necessary...change brings new life and new opportunities...change leads you into ways you were not expecting...change can be growth...change keeps you from dying bit by bit...

embrace change!

i believe change comes in two ways...sometimes you decide you need a change, and you make the choice to move on...sometimes fate hands you a change you weren't expecting...both kinds of change are hard in different ways...

change that you decide to make gives you time to consider all the options and alternatives on the front end - new job, new boss, new place to live, new marital status, whatever...on the front end of this change decision, there obviously has to be a catalyst that shows life not to be what you wanted it to be - poor pay, being passed over for promotion, unsatisfactory working conditions, unresolvable conflict...

at first it's like a trapeze artist trying to jump off the platform to catch the swing....you think and think about how to hold onto the past in some way and just make a few adjustments...

obviously that doesn't work for long, so you have to move to additional actions - learning to let go, then turning your full attention to the new...and that's where change gets scary...for a moment in time, you are suspended in midair between past and future...this is when you find out what stuff you're made of...

the other kind of traumatic change is the kind that is thrust on you from a secondary source: your job is downsized, someone you love walks out, you face a catastrophic illness...now you're in a quick-change mode where a new plan has to be made in a hurry - no time to think or evaluate...big life transitions come whether we're ready or not...

first, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and take a step...sure, you're scared...sure, you feel unprepared to go on...you are uncertain where your best resources are...fear is OK...but standing still and whining only intensifies fear...take a step...move in some direction...

second, sudden change sometimes moves you in a direction that turns out better than you ever imagined...let unexpected changes bring you some things you really wanted - a new part of the country, new friends, a new profession...since everthing is up in the air anyway, throw in the changes you would like to see happen...

third, make lemonade...i have this card that i keep...it is a picture of an oil painting of a lemon placed in my journal to remind me to make lemonade when life hands me a sack full of lemons...somehow, get a positive slant on the situation - not always an easy thing...i know...but if you can see a tiny piece of the change that has a positive slant, you can begin to build on that...

fourth, embrace the change...it is a part of your life now...whether you wanted it or not...resistance to change takes a lot of energy and prevents you from moving on to enjoy life...yes, i said enjoy life...move on...

pray for guidance...remember, you are still measuring life with a very short stick...God is measuring your life by eternity...He knows how this experience fits into the total picture...trust Him...

i have had a lot of changes in my life - some shocking, some sad, some planned, and some where i went kicking and screaming every step of the way...but something good has come out of every change...as i bend into the pain of transition...i find myself growing stronger and able to do things i never thought i would do...and most of the time i was able to understand that, yes, the change left me in a more favorable situation than before...

the love of my nieces...

sometimes i have a hard time accepting how old my two beautiful nieces are getting...they have grown and blossomed into two of the most remarkable young ladies i know...i am so proud of the both of them...

our times spent together are so precious...whether it be a girls weekend...or a ladies nite out...or movie nite...or just getting together for an ice cream...that time is spent in lots of laughter...lots of sharing...sometimes tears...but all in all a geniune love for each other...

when they were little...it was easy to plan time with them...but now that they have grown...and are able to drive...they have lives of their own...their own friends...loves...activities...

they still make time for their auntie...and that truly warms the cockles of my heart...

my oldest niece will be leaving soon to college...she has worked so hard to get to where she is...and it was through this hard work...her determination...that she has landed in a great school...at first we thought it would be a few hours away...which was difficult to comprehend...but now...it looks like she will be out of state...not only out of state...but in a whole different time zone...

as hard as that is...her sister & i are already planning our visits...there will be a few for sure...

and as these last few weeks are slowly closing in...before she takes off...i know that she has tons of friends that she needs to spend time with...but even in that...she is making sure that we have "our" time...a few more get togethers...she and her sister are thoughtful that way...

the younger niece...is a spit fire...i love her spunk...her zeal...her craziness...
the older one...gets mistaken for being quiet...but she is quite the comedy relief...that is probably part of the fun...it is so unexpected...

i do not think the two of them realize how much joy they bring me...i love hearing all about their escapades...their loves...their shenanigans...even being able to share each others hurts...the story that is their life...

i am thankful for them...i am thankful of their hearts...most of all...i am thankful to know them...

love you j & m...

twisting balloons...

look how far twisting balloons has come...

this is what i love about fashion...there truly is no end to the possibilities of a creative mind...

although...i think these would be difficult to sit in =)

which is your favorite?