willing to let go...

i may have posted this once before...maybe...maybe not...but it is worth a re-post...no?

a devouring month...

stick a fork in me...i'm done...

over the past month...i've celebrated my birthday...over and over and over again...and then thanksgiving...and then more celebration of my birthday...i've pretty much eaten enough cake and pie to feed a small country...in addition to the sweets...drinks flowed freely....for thanksgiving...i wolfed down turkey...yams...stuffing...and more dessert...and then last nite...ended it all with beignets in the city...oh yeah...i'm a bit scared to weigh myself...

so...from now till christmas...when i will indulge again...i'm sure...it will be back to healthy eating...

i'm so glad calories don't really count during the holiday season... =) or is that a lie i've been telling myself? all in all...it has been a wonderful month...

the house is now decorated for christmas...and i hope to enjoy the rest of this year...although it's a bit stressful right now...i want to focus on the reason for the season...as best i can...

happy thanksgiving...

“thanksgiving day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow...”
~ edward sandford martin

“thanksgiving day is a jewel, to set in the hearts of honest men, but be careful that you do not take the day and leave out the gratitude...”
~ e.p. powell

"thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action..."
w.j. cameron

wishing you a fabulous thanksgiving day & weekend...may you be surrounded by family & friends...and may you always have much for which to be thankful for...

repost: thanksgiving...every day...

no...i'm not being lazy...well...part of it is that i have a to-do list the size of...well...let's just say...it's really long...and i'm feeling a bit stressed...so i thought...for a little inspiration..let me see what i was blogging about last year...and then i read this post...and i thought...hmmm...i think i should repost...if for any other reason...than it being a good reminder for myself...thanksgiving...should be every day...not just one day a year...

here it is...

i read a snipet of a blog the other day that really resonated with me...here is a portion of it...taken from "cyndi monroe - unscripted"

"It's funny how Thanksgiving rolls around and it seems there is a nation-wide urge to suddenly become grateful or, at the very least, a willingness to publicly acknowledge "an attitude of gratitude". You know what I am talking about. Politicians and celebrities get their "God voice" on and, speaking in dulcet tones, inform us how thankful they are. Then to prove it, they spend four hours of one day serving at the homeless shelter (photo op nirvana). That makes me somehow want to NOT say anything, not jump on the band wagon, so to speak. I really am overwhelmingly grateful to my Lord for his constant, pervasive generosity that I find I don't want to get mixed up with the "fair weather" thankers (does that make sense?)."

i love when someone writes so eloquently what i am thinking...but don't know how to quite put it into words...honestly..i don't think i could have written it as well...

even this last week...on facebook...there were so many wonderful gratitude status updates...including my own...but as the holidays roll in...it is a constant thought on my mind...why is it...that we celebrate family & friends so openly during this time of year...and then it seems to come to this abrupt halt...

not that we stop being thankful and loving...but it shouldn't be only on a designated day...just like valentine's day...why should feb 14th be the day that one proclaims their love openly to their significant "other"...

one of my favorite christmas songs is "don't save it all for christmas day" by avalon...i even blogged about it last year...here it is if you would like to see the lyrics...the first time i heard the words of this song...it rang in my heart...so strongly...

so...yes...this thanksgiving...i hope that you were thankful for all that the Lord has blessed you with...and this coming holiday season...i hope that you will love and hug your friends and family...but how great to continue in that through out the year...

the most wonderful moments for me have been telling someone in my life...whether friend or family...that i am thankful for them...or that i love them...in the most unexpected moments...with no fanfare...no one around...

thanksgiving should be everyday...especially for those of us who have been blessed with knowing the wonderful love and mercies of our Lord & Savior...

thankful for debt paid...

i had a debt i could not pay...He paid a debt he did not owe...

as we are entering into the week of thanksgiving...so much to be thankful for...first and foremost...i am thankful for the love my Father has for me...the debt He paid...one i could never humanly understand...but thankful...none the less...

Here I Am To Worship
Chris Tomlin

Light of the world
You stepped down into darkness.
Opened my eyes, let me see.
Beauty that made this heart adore You
Hope of a life spent with You

Here I am to worship,
Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're altogether lovely
All together worthy,
All together wonderful to me

King of all days
oh, so highly exalted
Glorious in heaven above
Humbly You came
To the earth You created
All for love's sake became poor

Here I am to worship,
Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're altogether lovely
All together worthy,
All together wonderful to me

I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost

Here I am to worship,
Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're altogether lovely
All together worthy,
All together wonderful to me

the sanctity of marriage...

...is something that i truly have no experience in...but i've seen the joys of it...and unfortunatly...i've seen the breakdown of it...many more times then i would have liked...what i know...is that it is a beautiful gift from the Lord...but one that needs constant work...will i be able to experience it one day? i guess time will tell...

when i heard the news shuffling around about eva longoria & tony parker breaking up...it made me sad...not only that it might be another divorce to hear about...but how the news was so quick to point it out...nothing much is said of the marriages that have stood the test of time...but marriages breaking apart seem to be news worthy...it is truly truly sad...and how it breaks the heart of God...

my friend Linda of "princess dominique" wrote an amazing post on it...i asked if i could post it on mine...and she graciously let me...she writes about fashion...and other "stuff"...be sure to check it out...

here it is...

Is Erin Berry the Cause of the Demise of the Eva Longoria and Tony Parker Marriage?

You never know what is at the root of a divorce. Inside Edition is speculating that Erin Berry (a friend of the couple-pictured below) has been texting back and forth with Eva’s husband. Imagine that. Someone being “that” friendly with your husband? I mean, gal pal shoe shopping aside it’s not that serious. Nowadays you have to be careful with the way you interact with people’s husbands or else someone is liable to run you over with a car. Or maybe I’m just talking about me.

The messages between them have reportedly gotten pretty STEAMY! Erin Berry is Tony’s former teammate Brent Berry’s ex-wife. My first thought is, “Why did they allow her to hang around so much in the first place?!?! I don’t get people. It’s like permissive parenting. What does that get you? A rotten child. The same thing goes for a marriage. You need boundaries that you DEMAND other people respect or else the CAN NOT be a part of your circle. Plain and simple.

On Facebook we were talking about a Pastor who said that the marriage people in his congregation need to DELETE Facebook because it is becoming a very common cause that has been brought up in counseling sessions that he’s had with couples and has been cited as a MAJOR problem.

As an advocate for marriage here are my thoughts with all the texting, Facebook and Twittering:

Couples need to do what’s best for them in term of whether to be on Facebook or not. If you hold your marriage in high esteem you will want to do everything in your power to protect it. If you see requests coming from old boy/girlfriends you need to bring that to the table, not hide the fact that you’ve reconnected with them on Facebook. That’s the beginning of deception and then you get tripped up.

I agree with what one friend (Rachel) said. Facebook (and the likes) aren’t a sin and if it wasn’t Facebook it would be something else ie. Twitter, Plurk, AIM–pick one. And Shamine (my good friend) is right too people cross the very boundaries that they set all the time and that’s proof that their marriage wasn’t their priority in the first place.

Your fruit is what tells on you. People can talk “words” all day but the evidence is the proof–what you “do” matters not what you “say”. You definitely have to search your heart on matters like this, but always also be aware that the enemy is just looking to stick his foot in your marriage. We have to learn to close the door to sin and stop using “trust” as a blanket word that makes us put on blinders.

A lot of women/men who trusted their husbands/wives are in divorce court now.

Guard your marriage and stop dragging your FRIENDS and FAMILY everywhere with you. A marriage is between two people. It’s bad enough that Eva and Tony both had their individuals careers that probably led them to spend only a limited amount of time together, but then when they do get together some miscellaneous chick on the rebound is toying with the sanctity of their marriage.

As you can see this is a RAW subject for me. Marriage is MORE than a piece of paper people–PLEASE get that.

one celebration at a time...

imagine my delight when my friend told me...that at her recent visit to nordstroms...there were big posters in the windows saying "we like to celebrate one holiday at a time...so you won't see our christmas decorations until after thanksgiving"

way to go nordstroms!

this has always been a pet peeve of mine...i mean...when you are in a store before halloween has even happened...and the music is piping carols...and you see christmas trees & ornaments everywhere...are we jumping ahead a bit? my friends pick fun at me...because to this day...i refuse to play christmas music until the day after thanksgiving...now i have to say...it is a bit hard to avoid that rule when in stores...just saying...

there are other seasons that need attention...like...thanksgiving...it is all about giving thanks...why do we bypass it? what happened to giving each season its due time...

and don't get me wrong...i love christmas...it is truly a magical time of year...i enjoy every aspect of it...the music...the family time...the giving of gifts...the receiving of gifts =)...the beautiful decorations...and most importantly...the wonderful gift of God's son to us...but i also want to live in the moment...and the moment for now is gearing up for thanksgiving...

although...this month is also my birthday...tomorrow to be exact...and i've been celebrating pretty much all month...and will continue to do so...but on thanksgiving day...it will not be about my birthday...but of all the blessings & family that i am so fortunate to be a part of...

but then again...thanksgiving shouldn't be about one day...but that is an entirely separate post...

until then...enjoy your weekend...i know mine will be full of celebration...cake & family & friends...

let's celebrate each season in the moment...

evening...then morning...

God called the light day and the darkness he called night...and there was evening and there was morning..." genesis 1:5

i was reading my bible one day and noticed a huge mistake in scripture... =) everyone knows that morning comes first...and then evening follows...right? but there it was in black and white...genesis 1:5 reads..."and there was evening...and there was morning..."

of course...it was no mistake...somehow...God started with evening...a time of rest...and a day's productivity came out of that...

we live in a culture where rest is often viewed in a negative light...when we work...we work hard...when we play...we play hard...we know how to fill our time with e-mail...activities...carpooling...cleaning...aerobics...and our to-do list...our focus is work all day...and then eventually rest...

have you ever been hit with a situation...whether sickness...or turmoil...or an event that rocks your world? and you sit there and think...i don't have time for this...this "thing" whatever it was...or is in your life...didn't consult with your schedule...there have been events in my life that made me look at and change...or put aside a lot of things i once thought were absolutely vital...just to make it through the day...but one thing that came out of that difficult time was a new list of priorities...the first? to balance my life...

i learned how to climb between the sheets and put aside my worries...to rest my body and my mind...to slow down when life became crazy and weigh what was
important...and what was not...i began to see evening as the first part of my day...from rest...sprang morning...

it's a concept that changed my life...not just physically...but also spiritually...recently in my life...my "things to do" were starting to be sandwiched together...and because of this...my time with my heavenly Father became "evening..." of course there were pertinent things that needed to be done...that required my attention...but spiritual time came first all week...my first priority was to listen to the heart of my Father instead of going over my to-do list...and out of that rest...sprang fruitful energy...i was refreshed and filled by His presence...instead of my efforts...

how often do we run out of steam because we are out of balance? i wish that i could say that i became forever balanced...but i'm not...there are times that i have to slow it down and reconsider my priorities all over again...and if physical rest or spiritual rest has been pushed to last place...i have to put it all on the table and let God help me sort through it so i can put "evening" back where it belongs...

what i am learning...is that when i push Him to last place...i miss out on hearing His voice...when i keep going until i drop...i get all tangled up in my to-do list...i know that life is busy...and i fail...which is why i need to constantly ask Him to help me discern between what is important...and what is not...reorganizing my life...and getting true rest that only comes from Him...

the old man with the matted hair...

a girlfriend sent this to me...it had such an impact on me...one thing that beth moore said so inspired me..."it's such a statement of God overtaking me and enabling me to do something i couldn't do...you have no idea how dangerous you would be if you would live filled to the measure with the fullness of Christ"

watch this vidoe story and be inspired to do great things for God...

bible study thoughts...

our bible study this time around has been based on chip ingram's "overcoming emotions that destroy"...did you know there is good and bad anger? we are learning how to gain control over it...how to use it in constructive ways...

the first week we learned the different ways that anger is dealt with...sometimes...we see the guy/gal that spews angry words and think they have an anger issue...it is the most apparent...but chip went over three different distinct ways people handle anger...the spewer...the leaker...and the stuffer...

it was interesting to hear the group start to share what areas they saw themselves in...i saw myself in all three...it was all dependant on the situation...on the person...how vulnerable i was feeling...the thing is...not one is better then the other...you can spew out horrible things and hurt someone...and yourself...you can leak unneccessary comments and hurt someone...and yourself...and you can stuff...and hurt others...and yourself...

anger is a secondary emotion...it comes about when we feel we have unmet needs...unmet expectations...or insecurities...and some of these can stem way back to our childhood...phew!

i can't wait till next week!

random thoughts on matthew 5...

a few random thoughts from my recent conversations with God...

the sermon on the mount in matthew 5 should be christianity 101...so...christians...how are we doing? are we meek? merciful? pure in heart?

what are you doing for the next generation? can you do more? i know i can...

i’ve learned that there are a few things you can’t talk about on social media sites without causing an uproar...and usually...these are subjects i avoid...is that right or wrong? every once in a blue moon...i'll throw out there what i’m praying about...questioning and/or pondering...but here’s what i’ve learned: people like their traditions...not only do they like them...they will go to ANY length to protect them...ask something that might challenge someone about holidays...anything that has to do with church...music & arts...politics...and 99% of the time you find that people cross their arms and refuse to budge...or they fight like hell to stand up for their tradition without any real basis for why they feel that way...God reminded me that the pharisees MISSED Jesus because he didn’t fit into their traditions...He didn’t come in the time or manner they were sure that their Messiah would...so...perhaps in our comfort and traditions...we are missing Him too?

i was having a conversation with a friend of mind...she had asked me if i'd seen the previous nites episode of glee...i have never watched the show...she was telling me how she hated how christians were painted with the broad brush of hating gay people...i am...however...aware that we earned that description...i remember on so many occasions...at different venues shown on the news...followers holding “God hates fags” signs and protesting...or the people with a deep hatred for jewish people and have signs that say “God hates israel” which just further proves to me that they have never opened a bible...i wonder what they think this accomplishes? i would never want to accept a God that hated me...

why are we so fearful? one small thing happens and we forget every scripture we know and everything about His character we’ve ever learned...we must not really believe His leadership is perfect...we overcome by the word of our testimony because we need to remind ourselves of how faithful He is...of all of His fingerprints throughout our lives....


christianity 101...
smile more...love more...give more mercy...worry less...don’t be selfish or stingy...find someone who is hopeless and give them hope...don’t write anyone off...be patient...don’t put anyone in time-out in your heart...forgive quickly and thoroughly...

veterans day...

thank you to all the men & women...the past who have served and the present who continue to safeguard our freedom and keep us safe at home!

i hope everyone today takes a moment and remembers our past and present military and their families and the commitment and sacrifices they make in order that we can enjoy our freedom here at home...

the letting go...

some things are just hard to let go of...

sugar...

relationships that have run their course...

the past...

a dream that will never happen because it was yours and not God’s...

shoes...

that person who REALLY did you wrong (see, you’re thinking of them right now)

and the clothes that just don't fit...

the latter...can go two ways...holding on to those that are too tight...which seriously...why do that to yourself?

or the ones that are now too big...as i tell my clients...by keeping them...you are giving yourself permission to get back in those big sizes...not good...

my closet is slowly dwindling down to just my favorite items...those that i can't wait to wear...holding on to them...well...i had so many excuses...what i spent on them...what memories they held...blah blah blah...it feels good...i have to say...

the shoes...that will take a little more time... =) actually...i wear all my shoes...so that isn't in need of letting go...

and i'm sticking to that...

if only...

so a week after kate's murder...they have arrested someone...you would think somehow that makes it a little easier to accept...but it doesn't...and what is worse...is that it was a parolee...out of prison since april...where he was serving time for attempted murder of a women in fresno county...

am i glad they caught him? of course...but there are so many "if only" moments...and i know that we can't live our lives by "if only"...but it makes you wonder if by mere decisions...a different outcome would unfold...

like why would someone be let out in the streets? as if to taunt us...and for him to finish the act...the one he didn't complete on an attemted murder...now to be back in prison...not for attempted murder...but murder...

"if only" kate had stayed in argentina longer...
"if only" she had missed her flight
"if only" she had gone out that nite...
"if only" the secured building had not let in a man posing as a utility worker...

the "if only" will drive you crazy...and we can't go back and change what has happened...her death was senseless...as so many are...who understands the mind of a killer...who wakes up and decides...today is the day...to take a life...

we are not promised tomorrow...so don't wait till then to do the things you want to do...to say the things you need to say...to love the ones who are in your life...

i often miss...

i often miss this little girl...
whose dreams had no barriers...
who believed in a world
where anything is possible
with a heart
that was full and unbroken...

what a week...

...it has been...all i can say...is that i am glad that it is almost finito...full of emotions...radical schedules...boutique time...and..after over two months...i finally got my car back...i'm surprised i remembered how to drive it...but i did...funny thing is that i've gotten so used to not having a car...i forget now that i actually have a car...go figure...

so my brain is like mush...i really have nothing to say...other then...

may your weekend be fabulous...

to realize...

To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
Who has given birth to a premature baby..

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.

Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.

You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special...

r.i.p. beautiful kate...

when my friend eileen told me i needed to meet her sister because the two of us were into "fashion" and kind of liked the same things...i never expected to meet a more vibrant & beautiful woman...who had such a zest for life...she traveled the world...and in those travels brought back beautiful baubles...we met several times after that first introduction...who would have thought that in less then a year...she would be gone...

with two people passing away this last weekend...both so young...unfortunately...as i was talking to my business partner & friend today...we talked about how it is in death that we realize how life can be snatched so quickly...and how it is a reminder...to not take it for granted...or those in our lives...

in kate's short life...she lived every day to the fullest...you just knew that about her...but who was to know...that after a trip in buenos aires with her mother...upon her return...she would be found dead the next morning...i am angry that life was taken from her...i am angry of the violence in our world...

i am also reminded...that we are not promised tomorrow...and that some of the things we so focus on...stupid mis-understandings...long lines...little annoyances...in the big picture...are just so not important...

live your life to the fullest...hug your loved ones...tell them you love them...each and every chance you get...

r.i.p. michael...

i consider it a true privilege to have known you michael...you were a true example of being Christ-like...you are definately in a better place...but we here on earth are missing out by not having you around...thank you for being such an incredible friend...you will be missed...

in loving memory...

our high school reunion - michael to my left

i asked why...

as humans i think it is quite normal to ask the question why...as a christian...many times...i think we are just better off not knowing the reasons why things have happened...and in some circumstances...you are given the ability to see the reasons why something or someone was kept from you...and all you can do is know in your heart...that it was in the Lord's will...for sure...

this weekend...i did question why...when i rec'd a message on friday evening that my good friend eileen's sister was found murdered in san francisco...i asked why...i had met eileen's sister several times...such a sweet woman...and vibrant...and here her life was cut short...at such a young age...i asked why...

then a day later...i get a message that my dear friend michael...from high school...passed away...i just saw him at our high school reunion a little over a month ago...i asked why...

we don't always understand why things happen...and we may question it...and i think that is ok...even though we may never know why...