chocolate birthday cake...nothing better...

when i was a little girl...for my birthday...i would always get either a strawberry or lemon cake...both my brothers would get chocolate cakes...nothing wrong with that...but i loved chocolate...and my brothers preferred the fruit flavors...but in my mom's mind...girls got pink & yellow...boys got the chocolate...kinda sexist...hahaha



as i got older...moved out...birthday cakes faded away...as i thought back on it...i think it was just that my birthday fell within the week of thanksgiving...so all the talk of desserts and stuff were based on the thanksgiving dinner...



i honestly do not remember the last time i got a birthday cake...let alone a chocolate one...it has definately been many many many years...periodically we would laugh about it during family dinners...how the strawberry & lemon cakes traumatized me...how i don't get birthday cakes...

everyone would laugh...but there was a little part of me every year...like a little girl...waiting & hoping that i would get a chocolate birthday cake...



this year...i decided to take matters into my own hands...why did someone else need to get me my birthday cake? if it is what i wanted...then i might as well go and get it...



my plan was in place...i went over to copenhagen bakery...looked at all the chocolate cakes...picked my favorite...asked them to write "happy birthday to me" and prepared to bring it to the family thanksgiving dinner...



as i walked into my mom & dad's house...the whole family was already there...and i made my announcement..."i have a surprise for everyone...this year i decided that i would finally get my own chocolate birthday cake...and i brought it today for all of us to share"



ok - as a side note...cracks me up that i buy something for myself and let everyone know that it is for them ;o)...kind of like the time that my ex boyfriend loved a girl wearing jeans...so i went out and bought a pair of jeans for myself...and told him i bought "him" a surprise...



but i digress...



seems my mom had been feeling pretty bad over the years...that my birthday was kind of over looked each year because of thanksgiving...this year...she had decided she was going to make it extra special...and she baked me a two layer chocolate cake with dulce de leche...and the most divine chocolate frosting ever...



needless to say...it completely touched me...not because it was chocolate...although that was pretty incredible...but because she took time out...while cooking up the whole spread for thanksgiving...to bake me my very own birthday cake...



she even had candles for me...and had everyone sing happy birthday to me...during the thanksgiving dessert time...



i was definately on a chocolate high last nite...and out of the seven different desserts out on the table...my mom's cake was the most delish...probably because it was made with so much love...



below is a pic of my two cakes...don't bother counting the candles...apparently my mom didn't have enough...haha

thanksgiving morning...

as i sit in the quiet of my home...i am overwhelmed with emotion...

there is so much to be thankful for...

as i think back over the year...there are so many things that didn't go the way i had thought they would...the way i had wanted them to...or the way i had planned...

it has been a year of lessons...some really hard lessons...
it has been a year of hurt...disappointment...
it has been a year of loss...betrayal...

but i sit today...and i am happier than i have been in years...how could that be?
i can say that for the first time in a really long time...i am content...i am content with where i am...

how can i have a thankful contented heart when the circumstances in my life are not what i had planned?

how can i have a thankful contented heart when the circumstances lie outside my control or my power to change it?

what i know for sure is that i serve a God who is trustworthy...and that He desires our good...God is sovereignly in control, providing for and working out ALL the circumstances in the lives of those who love Him. He is intimately involved with us...and He works out His purposes through the events in our lives...

what i know for sure is that God's love for His people is not determined by the circumstance in our lives. His love is steadfast...our marital status (dating life), career or finances might fluctuate or totally fall apart...in spite of that, though...we can..and must give Him thanks...He is always with us...

during this year...i have felt more love from family and friends...they surrounded me...they never said "i told you so"....even though they had warned me...they stood by me...comforted me...encouraged me...and loved me...

i know that was God...because at my lowest point...it was Him who came and met me...picked me up...and carried me...carried me until i was able to walk again...carried me until i was able to look beyond my circumstances at all that i truly had...

and i have a lot...

so as i'm sitting in the quiet...knowing that in about 5 hours...i will be with family...the first time in a long time...that the whole family will be together...i know there will be a lot of laughter...goofiness...stories told...teasing...

and for that...i am thankful...

but most of all...i am thankful for my Father in Heaven...who loves me in spite of me...

as i open up my itunes...i search songs based on the word "thankful"...

the first song plays...and once again i am overwhelmed...how appropriate...these words ring so true...

thankful by the katinas

Just a little while longer I wanna pray
Can't get You off my mind so I came to say
Thank You Lord just for loving me
Many times as I do forget
Every need that You have met
Oh thank You Lord,
I know You're showing me
You are there when I am down and out
You're holding me, Your love is so amazing
Oh it changed me

Chorus:
Here I am with all I am
Raise my hands to worship You
I wanna say thank you, oh thank you
For everything, for who You are
You cover me, You touch my heart
I wanna say thank you

I could have died in my sin but You saved me
Didn't have any hope at all
You gave me peace divine, strength to carry on
I should have been the one to pay
But instead You took my place
My Jesus, words cannot explain
Even though I don't deserve Your love for me
You look beyond my fault and You showed mercy

I wanna say thank you for the sun
I wanna say thank you for the rain
Everything You do is beautiful
I'm so grateful for Your love

Chorus:
Here I am with all I am
Raise my hands to worship You
I wanna say thank you, oh thank you
For everything, for who You are You cover me,
You touch my heart I wanna say thank you

may you find contentment in your situations...happy thanksgiving!

the order of events...

pet peeves...i have a few...but one that seems to really get under my skin...is the fact that christmas is promoted...seems like earlier and earlier...are we going to get to the point where christmas decorations are seen in the stores year round?

this year i think i saw the first glimpse of christmas in stores in late september...what happened to halloween and more importantly...thanksgiving??

i am pretty stubborn in my own "rules" of holiday start times...and actually...hopefully...i won't change ;o)

for example...i will not pull out any of my christmas stuff...or listen to christmas music...until the day after thanksgiving...something in me...i cannot do it...i feel at times that thanksgiving is just kind of thought of for a moment...and then the focus is back on the upcoming christmas holiday...

thanksgiving to me is a very special holiday...and yes...part of it is that i LOVE turkey SO much...actually i love all the food that is served at the thanksgiving table all the way to desserts...which in our household is quite the variety...

but more importantly...it is a time to really focus on all that we have...not necessarily in material items...but not to ignore those...but also...all the areas we have been blessed...all the wonderful family and friends that we are surrounded with...

there are so many things to be thankful for...and no...it shouldn't be thought of only on this day...but we also shouldn't live it as any other day...

yesterday was another reminder...just like every big event that happens...some make us think about what we have...and where we are in life...

it is sad that it takes tragedy, or the loss of someone you love, to snap us back to realizing what we have...

this thanksgiving...if you are fortunate enough to sit around a table full of family and friends...maybe even those irritating relatives...that may be a bit hard to handle...and food on the table...and laughter...

thank the Lord for your fortune...in a world where we are constantly wishing for more...many times...not happy with our current situations...

we are a blessed people...

so as i am like a little child...excited about pulling out my christmas music...i know that opportunity will come...at its appointed time...for now...i want to bask in all the blessings the Lord has given me...

i want to thank Him for my family...quirky as we may be...
i want to thank Him for my friends...who this year...have really surrounded me when i needed it most...
i want to thank Him for my health...
i want to thank Him for my home...
i want to thank Him for my beautiful two boys...(yes...my kitties) who entertain me daily...
i want to thank Him for the life He has given me...although at times it has been hard...it is a great life...and my hope is that it brings Him honor...

happy thanksgiving...

a little too much excitement in san mateo...

this morning started like any other...except that i remember talking to my uncle and telling him how there was a shooting last nite 4 blocks away from where i was having dinner...we were in the financial district in san francisco...how much safer can you be??

i told him that no place is safe anymore...

fast forward 1 1/2 hours...it is 9:30 or so...and i head out to my car...as i am driving out of the driveway...i look to my right...and see a cop car...i think that this is a little strange...then look left...it looks clear...so i proceed out of the driveway...turning left...only to be blocked by two other cop cars...i stopped at that point...wondering...should i keep driving? do i stop?
a police officer frantically motions for me to keep driving...

as i'm driving away...i had no idea that i would not be back in my home until a little after 4pm...

returning to my street 30 minutes later...my street was completely blocked off...no one could drive in...i parked my car...and stood waiting for the news...

15 minutes earlier there were gun shots...pop pop pop...it was like a movie...and then silence...so surreal...

as the minutes passed...different stories emerged...the bank on el camino had been robbed..and then the robbers ran and invaded a home on my street...four doors down from my house...four doors!!

now the story is that there was no bank robbery...just a home invasion...as the robber barged in...the mother was able to txt her husband...who called the police...

one neighbor i stood by...his room mate was still in the apartment when there was a knock on the door...he answered it to find snipers at his door needing to come in and set up...

our one tiny block...blocked off at each end with police yellow tape...had about 25 police cars, the swat team, the sniper team & hazmet services...

as the stories unveiled...the family that had recently moved in...two children ages 1 and 3...were home with their mother...as the mother was throwing her children out of the window...she was shot in the back...and later died...

what is our world coming to? san mateo has got to be one of the safest neighborhoods you could live in...this was so random...

we were finally allowed back into our homes a little after 4pm..as i sit in my living room...half the block is still taped off...police officers are everywhere...forensics are here...news reporters from every station...

and all i could think of is this poor mother...24 years old...risking her life to save her two young children...

my phone has been ringing off the hook...as people are either watching the news on tv...or have driven by my neighborhood...everyone wants to make sure i'm ok...and once again i am reminded...of how blessed i am in my life...with so many people that love me...

my prayers are with these two small children...and their father...who now must work through this ordeal and the loss of their mother/wife...

we are really living in crazy times...and this is a reminder...that no one is promised tomorrow...live your life each day as best you can...

laughter..the best medicine...

friday nite i had the opportunity to see damon wayan's at cobbs comedy club...

i usually do not like comedy clubs...some weird fear i have that "i" will be the one picked on...definately not the kind of attention i crave for...there are always those obnoxious people that make a point of annoying the comedian...i guess in hopes of getting a little bit of the lime light...me...not so much...i just want to sit and enjoy the show...

friday...i got a chance to do that...damon was hilarious...i laughed till my stomach hurt...it was THE best medicine...

the wayans have a full family of comedians...all the brothers are funny...can you imagine what there family get togethers must be like?

although it has been my birthday week...and every day has been so much fun and full of love from my friends and family...there is the underlying stress that is there...finances, the economy, feeling pulled into situations that i shouldn't be a part of...but am...all in all...when i get home...that is what awaits me...stress...

friday nite showed me how wonderful laughter is...i am sure that there was a room full of people that had stress, hurt, loneliness, loss...but for a while...everyone just laughed...does it make the pain go away? does it make the stress go away? no...it is still there...but the laughter from deep inside you...when it erupts...it in some way releases some of that...even if only for a short time...

throughout the weekend...i would remember some of the things that damon had said in his show...and it brought the smile back...brought the laughter back...

research has shown that laughter has health benefits as well as a way for stress management...and the good thing is...you can get it for free...

"mirth is God's medicine. everybody ought to bathe in it" henry ward beecher

"the most wasted of all days is one without laughter" e.e. cummings

"laughter is the shortest distance between two people" victor borge

laughter is contagious...so if you have a chance for laughter...seize the moment...

a parisian birthday...

anyone who knows me...knows that i love anything french...french fashion...french food...i can always spot a fleur-de-lis...in fact...many reside in my home...and then there is just paris...beautiful beautiful paris with its eiffel tower, cafe's, shopping, museums, churches...just thinking about it...makes me want to go back...(dana...are you ready?)...

my birthday "nite" was celebrated "paris" style...i was greeted at the door with a dozen beautiful red roses...(that isn't necessarily french...but it was lovely...none the less)

dinner was at chouchou (pronounce shooshoo) a french bistro...chouchou comes from the term "mon petit chou" literally translated as "my little cabbage", but actually means "cutie-pie" awww...

on the third thursday of each november, from little villages and towns like romanèche-thorins, over a million cases of beaujolais nouveau begin their journey through a sleeping france to paris for immediate shipment to all parts of the world. banners proclaim the good news: le beaujolais nouveau est arrivé! "the new beaujolais has arrived!" one of the most frivolous and animated rituals in the wine world has begun.

well...the third thursday of november this year...fell on my birthday...so there was quite the celebration going on in the restaurant...

the restaurant is a tiny hole in the wall...you would really only know about it through word of mouth...which honestly are my favorite kinds of restaurants...
the host was adorable...as we walked in he gave us the biggest hug...both my date and i! he welcomed us to the celebration...and told us a little of the meaning of this third thursday in november...

dinner was absolutely deliscious...nice and rich...and mouth watering...paired with a bottle of the beaujolais nouveau...and then of course...the best part...dessert! a chocolate pear tart...

as we were leaving...the host ran out to the street...to give us one more big hug...

it was such a warm friendly atmoshere...from the moment we stepped in to the restaurant...until the very last moment...

and me?? well...i honestly felt like i had been taken to paris for my birthday...

happy birthday to adena and me...

happy birthday adena!! and happy birthday to me!

my partner and dear dear friend adena and i share the same birthday! can you imagine?? two fashionista's out and about on the town??

that was us last nite! what a fun time...good conversation...and those pomegranate martini's...won't say how many we had...but hey...we were celebrating! and on top of it?? i get the most beautiful vintage bracelet...oh...how she knows me!

adena - i love you girl! so much! it has been a pleasure getting to know you this year...working with you! sharing fashionista loves together...but most of all...just having you in my life as a friend...you are an absolutely beautiful woman...inside and out...and i am proud to call you my friend!

and me...well...i have always loved celebrating my birthday...it is truly the time in my life where i am reminded of how many wonderful people i am blessed to call my friends...

my phone has been ringing off the hook...i have txt messages galore...birthday cards are filling up my kitchen counter...email is full of ecards i haven't even gotten to...i have birthday plans through mid december in my calendar...

and i just sit back and thank the Lord for the blessings...i am surrounded by so many incredible friends and family...some i've known a lifetime...others are new friends...the length of time doesn't really matter...what matters is that i have for some reason...been blessed with so much love in my life...and for that...i am forever grateful!