for everything...

for everything i've ever tried to hold,

i have a scar...

a scar from the struggle it took

to secure

what didn't want to stay.

for everything i've ever sought to possess

i have wounds

deep, empty ones

betraying what i would rather keep secret

private disappointments

public rejections

and barren hopes...

spurned affections

adulterous hearts

that stumbled in their faithfulness

to my affections.

i have cried,

i have wept over spilled love

cut myself on the shards of a broken heart

and watched my emotions bleed

into every situation thereafter...

in struggling to stop the flow,

i bandaged myself in layers of denial

only to find

the scars still there

when i deemed it safe to look...

new prospects picked at the scabs

reopening old wounds

and leaving deeper evidence

of my previous pain.

oh no there is no denying

i've tried to possess some hearts in my time

and found them all slippery

too slippery to hold

and call my own...

and at the end of the day

the only thing that remains

in my complete possession

is my heart

and the ability to make better choices...