the details...

the love of our Father still amazes me...how He cares for us...protects us...and prepares us...so much of which i think we will never even know or realize...

case in point...when i spoke to a sweet dear friend...and family member...her husband suffered an aneurysm...scared everyone...obviously...everyone starting praying...and God miraculously healed Him...and if that is not amazing enough...speaking to "r" today...she started telling me of all the little details that took place...in essence...God taking care of her prior to getting to that moment...during the time her husband was in the hospital...and the care afterwards...

i think sometimes we miss so much of what God is doing for us...when we stop paying attention...or only focus on the big things that we need...or want...or are dealing with...we miss those incredibly moments of God being at work...in our lives...24/7...

He is into the details...every single detail of our life...i for one...am thankful for that...

shield of faith...

the end of ephesians 6:16 says: above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one...

now...i know we are never to take a portion of a scripture...but read all that is before and after...and i have...and i hope that you will as well...but today i wanted to focus on those fiery darts...

well...not specifically the fiery darts...although i feel like they keep flying my way...left and right...but for me...the focus is on "taking the shield of faith"...

because..believe me...if i hadn't taken the shield of faith...i'm not quite sure what my attitude would be right now...

the bad news is...we have the enemy who is after us...

the good news is...God knows it!

so what is this shield of faith? faith is...believing God...simple...and it is a choice...a choice we make...are we going to choose to believe...or not...

my faith is based on who God is...not my circumstances...

and although there are times i get a little afraid of some of my circumstances...i know that "fear" is the opposite of faith...because when i fear...i am not believing that God is with me...fear makes me take a step back...faith makes me take a step forward...and since i really don't want to be taking steps back..i "choose" to have faith...to believe God...

dear God...

who i am to who i can become...

have you ever felt like you weren't amounting to much? or that where you were in life...wasn't exactly where you thought you'd be? i've had those moments...and i've had those moments where it was really hard for me to comprehend the Father's love for me...

i was reading an interesting excerpt from a zig ziglar book...i think it was a book on child rearing actually...but this specific section that was sent to me...was on the subject of how we look at people...specifically children...but really...it can be applied to anyone in your life...and God used it to completely change my perspective as a woman and as His child...here's what i read:

Andrew Carnegie was the wealthiest man in America in the early 1900s, so wealthy that he employed over 42 millionaires! One day a reporter who was intrigued by Carnegie's wealth asked how he developed these men to become so valuable that he would pay them that much money. Carnegie explained, "Men are developed the same way gold is mined. When gold is mined, several tons of dirt must be moved to get an ounce of gold, but one doesn't go into the mine looking for dirt — one goes in looking for gold. And the more he looks for, the more he finds."

after this story...ziglar challenged parents to look past their children's mistakes and mine for gold in them...and although i don't have children...i'd been buried in the dirt that day...my discouragement and feelings of failure as a daughter...friend...sister...left me so disappointed in myself...i was also convinced God felt the same way about me...

pity set in and i started wishing i had a gold-miner in my life who could see beyond my mistakes and find the gold in me...that's when God whispered to my heart..."elena...i am that gold-miner...you are the one who is so critical of yourself...you are the one who focuses on your faults...but i see the gold of My image in your heart...and i want to bring it to the surface so your family & friends can see Me in you..."

as i sat there trying to process what God was whispering to my heart...stories and promises from the bible started flooding my thoughts helping me believe that God really does see beyond who i am to who i can become...it would take time for those truths to sink in...but that day God used His thoughts to give me a new perspective...of Himself and of myself...then He challenged me to look for ways to transfer that perspective to my family & friends...

it's easy to get buried in the dirt of discontentment...disobedience and discouragement...you may even be thinking...where's the gold in it all? i wondered...too...but after reading carnegie's story and hearing God speak to my heart...i wanted to become a gold-mining woman...

as i thought about the gold i'd like to portray...character traits like patience, kindness and contentment came to mind...as the weeks passed...i'd find a new character trait and bible verse...think about ideas to live it out and make them part of my daily walk...God's Word became a part of my everyday life as He taught me to take my eyes off of others...and focus on their hearts. God had given me a new perspective, and a whole new sense of purpose...

i thank You Lord...for not focusing on the dirt in my life but seeing beyond who i am to who i can become...help me believe that...receive that and give it away to my family & friends...help me look at their hearts and encourage the glimpses of You that i see in them...that is my continual prayer...

unprecedented favor...

i heard the most awesome sermon this sunday by joel osteen...he was talking about unprecedented favor...how when God blesses us...He does more then He has done already...so for example...if you had been blessed with a raise of 10%...His next blessing would blow that out of the water...maybe not necessarily in another raise...but something that far surpasses the last blessing...joel gave some incredible real life scenarios of this at work...

it filled my heart...

i want to wake up every morning and thank the Lord for His unprecedented favor in my life...i am excited daily of the wonderful things He does...but mostly in the little surprises He gives me...those moments that you know that you know how much He loves you...

the definition of "unprecedented" is: adjective without previous instance; never before known or experienced; unexampled or unparalleled: an unprecedented event

how exciting is that??

happy first day of fall...

while it is a little bit hard to believe that it is the first day of fall...not only because the year has flown by...but also because of the weather...today while on my hike (2nd one this week! the weather demanded it...) it hit about 89 degrees here in the lovely bay area...who is thinking about fall??

but mostly...what i think about during the changes of season...the reminder...of the seasons in our life...while i love summer...the warm weather...i love fall because of fall fashion...but i can't have one...if i'm clinging to the old...

so while in this case...the weather is not permitting me to pull out my cozy sweaters and boots...the plaids...the rich colors...the clothing i love to wear...i am not quite ready to give up warm sunny days for cold ones...

as in the seasons of life...some are hard seasons to go through...think of them as the winters...the cold harshness of it all...and as much as i was tired of the cold last winter...summer eventually came around...

a reminder...that sometimes...during the hard times...when we think we won't see a happy day...a sunny day...it will eventually come around...and during the season...when we aren't loving our circumstances...if we hold on to the fact...that we are not alone...but mostly...He makes beauty from ashes...those ashes in certain seasons of our life...they help strengthen us...make us more of who He wants us to be...if we let Him...

photo source

who am i?

...that you would love me so gently? i am overwhelmed by the Father's love for me...

who am i? ~ watermark
(one of my favorites...)

Over time you’ve healed so much in me
And I am living proof
That although my darkest hour had come
Your light could still shine through
And though at times it’s just enough to cast
A shadow on the wall
Well, I am grateful that you shine your light on me at all

Who am I that you would love me so gently?
Who am I that you would recognize my name?
Lord, who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high
Who am I?

Well, amazing grace how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost but now am found
Was blind, but now I see
And the more I sing that sweet old song the more I understand
That I do not comprehend this love that’s coming from your hand

Who am I that you would love me so gently?
Who am I that you would recognize my name?
Lord, who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high
Who am I?

Grace, grace, God’s grace
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within
Grace, grace, God’s grace
Grace that is greater than all our sin

Who am I that you would love me so gently?
Who am I that you would recognize my name?
Lord, who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high
Who am I?

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
Amazing love, now flowing down
From hands and feet that were nailed to the tree
His grace flows down and covers me.

nice surprises...

...i've had a few lately...did i mention how much i love them? mostly...when they are a direct hit from the Father up above...thankful for His tremendous patience with me and my human-ness...for although i speak of His goodness...His love...His grace...His mercies...i am still often surprised when things happen...

this week...healing that came only from Him for a friend...unexpected sale...unexpected visitor...unexpected invitation...and the week is only half way done...

i am so undeserving of His love...yet He gives it so freely...thank you Jesus...

house guests...

one thing that i absolutely love...is having the occasional house guest...being a single woman...living alone...you kind of get used to a quiet home...which in and of itself...is good at times...

however...there is something about having lots of activity going on...as well...my house guest arrived early sunday morning...which was thrilling enough...but then on top of it...it meant that my weekend was officially extended...(being my own boss...easy decision to make)...and...we had some of our best summer weather...in mid september! high 90's graced us these last few days...

so...we got in a hike...some shopping...lot's of eating...kind of sounds like my weekend away a few weeks ago...it is looking like a pattern is forming...

but then...the house guest leaves...and the house is once again...quiet...the first day is a little hard to get used to again...it is a snap back into reality...

but i know...soon enough...hopefully...another house guest will be arriving...

oh friday...

oh friday...i welcome you with open arms...after a very emotional weekend...last weekend...totally my own fault...too much 9/11 tv watching...i am SO ready for this weekend...friend is coming out to stay with me...lots of activities planned...hoping for some sunny warm weather...and fun fun fun...

but before that all happens...lots of cleaning...so don't have the time to post much today...

may your weekend be fabulous...with whatever you choose to do!

soldiers in your cup...

One morning, a grandmother was surprised to find that her 7-year-old grandson had made her coffee!

Smiling, she choked down the worst cup of her life.

When she finished, she found three little green Army men at the bottom.

Puzzled, she asked, "Honey, what are these Army men doing in my coffee?"

Her grandson answered, "Like it says on TV, Grandma...The best part of waking up is soldiers in you're cup...

photo source

self promotion...

...shameless...aren't i? but it is my 2 year blogaversary over at my "business" blog...so...just in case you've never ventured over there...why not do that today? i mean...doesn't everyone want a little fashion tidbit in there day?

www.fabulousfinds-elena.blogspot.com

in remembrance...

in some ways...it doesn't seem like the terrorist attacks on american soil on september 11...happened 10 years ago...in other ways...it seems like a long time ago...i spent most of the weekend watching all the coverage of it on tv...talk about an emotional weekend...

the thing is...it didn't happen here in our backyard...but i recalled all the times i had been in those buildings...my main clients there were cantor fitzgerald...many many years ago...and my girlfriend who worked across the street from the world trade center...we spoke this weekend...she said that when she started seeing all the coverage...she could smell it...and feel all that smoke...and terror...like it was happening again...

although i enjoyed the beautiful stories that came out of that horrible day...most of it was horrific...and even scary...they say hindsight is 20/20...and when hearing of all the miscommunication with the faa & other authorities...one can only imagine had some things been handled differently...

after a weekend of saturation...i realized that this is how it was then...10 years ago...at some point you had to remove yourself from the tv...or you could literally get sucked in for hours...and start feeling the horror...the sadness...the evil that exists in our world...

the thing is...no matter what facts came out of the commission report...all the errors...that day can never be brought back...there is no "do-over"...and those people that lost their lives...the families that lost loved ones...can never get that back...we can only learn from it...as it is in life...as long as we keep learning...reaching...for a higher purpose in life...and realizing that this life is for a moment...

my heart goes out to the families...even now...10 years later...the children who have lived without a parent...or both parents...the parents who lost children...and the countless thousands who gave of their time to help in the rubble...and who many now...are facing deadly illnesses because of the toxin air they were breathing in...all those affected...may the peace of the Lord be on them...

God lives under the bed...

received this story in an email today...touched at my heart strings...to have this child like faith...what a wonderful thing...and a simple life...i think one of the things i love the most...is spending an afternoon with a child...to see their excitement over the most mundane things...the way we should look at life...every day...

GOD LIVES UNDER THE BED

I envy Kevin. My brother, Kevin, thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night.

He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, and I stopped to listen, 'Are you there, God?' he said. 'Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed....'

I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement. But that night something else lingered long after the humor. I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in.

He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult.

He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will. He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.

I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life?

Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and later to bed.

The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child.

He does not seem dissatisfied.

He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work.

He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.

And Saturdays - oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. 'That one's goin' to Chi-car-go! ' Kevin shouts as he claps his hands.
His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.

And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips.

He doesn't know what it means to be discontent.

His life is simple.


He will never know the entanglements of wealth or power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats. His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be.

His hands are diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it.

He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished. But when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax.


He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure.


He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue.


Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. And he trusts God.


Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an 'educated' person to grasp. God seems like his closest companion.


In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith.


It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions.

It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap. I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances - they all become disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.

Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn? After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God.

And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed.

Kevin won't be surprised at all!

where are you God?

have you ever asked that question? i know i have...the thing is...looking back...i realize the problem wasn't where God was...but where i was...you see...He doesn't leave us...we leave Him...

and then there are the times where we haven't left Him...but it feels like He is no where to be seen or heard...i've had those moments too...looking back...i realize that it was a time of true growth...of really living what i said i believed...

believing in things that i couldn't see...and sometimes...couldn't feel...it was in those times...those times of complete aloneness...even from God...at least that is what i felt...that the relationship between God & i grew stronger...

and prepared me...for times when that would happen again...what i know for sure...is that He has never left me...He has never deserted me...He has always had my best interest at heart...

how can i doubt? even in the times that i do not feel His presence...i know He is near...

pauses in your life...

never put a period where God has placed a comma...God's pauses in your life are never permanent...God's delays are not always God's denial...

i read this sentence about a week ago...it was in the mix of one of those emails that encourages you to send to a certain amount of people...blah blah blah...this sentence just stuck out...so glaringly...

i remember reading it several times...remembering the times that i have done just that...being so sure "i" knew what God had just decided on my life...and really...all it was...was me not getting something i had asked for...prayed for...and instead of talking to God...and getting to the heart of it...i assumed...i knew what God was doing...

it is so human to do just that...isn't it? when really...we should be thinking...there is a pause in my life...what is God trying to tell me? teach me? is there perhaps something that i need to work on...before the next step...

i am learning to stop when something happens...and right away ask God...what are You trying to tell me? is there an obstacle that i have placed in the way of Your will? the great thing...is that if you really listen...you know...that means to stop talking? stop analyzing...stop assuming...but really listen...God will let you know exactly what the next step should be...

a much needed weekend...

i did not realize how much i needed the long weekend...until i got back home today...and i even gave myself an extra day...as if...maybe...i did know how much i needed it...but what does it matter? the fact remains...i got it...and it was splendid...just absolutely fabulous...

a nice mixture of friends...pool-time...shopping...and good eating always makes for a good weekend...

and now...i have no excuse but to hit the ground running this week...so much to do...the list is endless...but somehow it seems a little bit easier to handle with the memories of laughter & fun...

hope your weekend was fabulous...

relinquishing control...

i know as christians there are always areas in our lives that are easier to give to God then others...i think the easy part for me is giving God the chance to lead my life and direct me...and i've pretty much always trusted the Lord to take me exactly where He wanted me...and He's done that...

then there are other areas of my life that are very difficult to hand over...one of those is my independence...i like to have a certain amount of control in knowing why things happen...and the order of things...that is something i've struggled with...with the Lord...because we don't always get answers as to why things happen the way that they do...

i can recount many times where i was going through a very difficult time...and although on the outside everything looked good...things weren't...i had alot of "whys" for God and didn't necessarily get alot of answers...

i struggle with letting Him have complete control of every area of my life because i want so much to remain in control...i'm learning that it is only in letting Him have every part...even my questions of "why" and "when" and "how..." that He can take my life and lead it the way it needs to be led...

each day...

i seriously cannot believe that it is september...the 1st day of september...which means christmas will be here in less then 4 months...where has the year gone? on the one hand...i feel like so much has been accomplished...and on the other hand...i feel like it was new years day...i blinked...and september 1st appeared...

time...something you really don't want to waste...for you know not how much time you will be allotted...so i say...make the most of every day...with childlike wonder...and gratefulness for each opportunity...each day...