beauty...

beauty...we all long for it...

what i know is that real beauty isn't what we see in magazines or on movie screens...and it doesn't depend on the opinions of others or the changing tastes of culture...true beauty is seeing ourselves as God see us...reflected in the mirror of His word...

inner beauty...knowing who we really are...is what is closest to my heart as i sat down to write today...most of my writings are prompted from situations or conversations that i've had...recently...i've had many conversations with a girlfriend...who had her heart broken...and she is focusing on her beauty...and how it wasn't enough...

this angers me so much...that a man would tell her things that made her feel unworthy...unlovely...

so she sits...damaged...searching...wondering...why she wasn't enough...

i've been there...i can relate...for me it was years of searching and a long hard journey to reach the point where i really believed and felt that i was worth something...that i had value...

i grew up in a wonderful christian home...i felt secure in my parents' love...and then i fell in love with Jesus...i remember how i felt God's intimate tender love for me...and my tears would flow...God gave me a sensitive heart...i have always felt things very deeply...what i didn't understand then...was the flip side of feeling deeply...yes...i was receptive to His Spirit and His presence...and that was wonderful...but i was also very sensitive...too sensitive...to the attitudes and comments of the people around me...

as the years went by...hurt by hurt...my walls went up...through the years...other walls followed..all to ward off the pain, loneliness...and rejection of being different from others...not accepted...and not really understood...

i was always taught that beauty on the inside was what counted...

somehow i knew that it should have been true...that inner beauty was more important...but as i looked around...even at a young age...i noticed that it really didn't count that much...at least not as far as how people treated you...the physically beautiful...the socially acceptable...and the currently fashionable were what people...even in the church...really accepted and esteemed...

goodness, kindness and consideration...the traits my family possessed and taught me were important...didn't seem to matter as much as popularity...a sassy comeback...the right clothes...and a pretty face...

for many years i struggled to reconcile what God wanted me to be with what the world told me i should be...a struggle that i still sometimes face today...

what i know most about beauty has come from God healing my heart and showing me who i really am...He has turned the ashes of my heart into beauty...the mourning into joy...and i am praying that He will do the same for my girlfriend...

everyone has beauty...but not everyone sees it...

to my girlfriend:
i want you to look into the mirror of God's word and see yourself as He sees you...i want you to know how much He loves you and how much you have because of His Son...i want you to grasp the depth of God's love for you...to discover and embrace the beauty within you...and then to delight in the unique beauty He has reserved for you and you alone...

when you know who you really are...i think that you glow with an inner radiance and confidence that affects every other part of your life...and as you absorb the truth of how much God loves you and grab hold of the promises He has made you...you'll be surprised and delighted as you see yourself being transfromed into the vibrant, healthy, complete, beautiful woman you were always meant to be...

what i know for sure...is that it was a journey for me...as i reflect...the struggles it took on my own path to understanding inner beauty...from insecurities and fear, through brokenness and doubt...i now...truly know...beyond a shadow of a doubt...what the psalmist proclaimed: "the King is enthralled by your beauty" psalm 45:11

beauty of form affects the mind, but then it must not be the mere shell that we admire...but the thought that this shell is only the beautiful case adjusted to the shape and value of a still more beautiful pearl within...jane porter

that is you...my beautiful friend...i see the pearl in you...my prayer is that you start to see it too...