naughty versus nice...

in the midst of a conversation yesterday...got to talking about naughty versus nice...believe me...my moments of naughty are nothing to write home about...because all in all...i am pretty much a "nice" girl...but i like to think i could be a little naughty ;o)

as i contemplate naughty versus nice, some experiences come to mind...for someone who lives and breathes nice, i look back at some moments in past years and wish i had invoked my inner bad girl at times...there is always that instant when my upbringing keeps me from saying what i am really thinking...my mother taught us to be polite and respectful...but what do you do if you have been confronted with an insult or a derisive comment? for example...a frenemy once said to me, "wow...you are sure not afraid to wear color...i would too if i was craving attention" or i like this one..."oh, i love that necklace...it is so much prettier than the jewelry you normally wear." in my nice-girl head, i was thinking, wow, so that's what you call a mean compliment...but what if naughty girl were to respond? what would naughty girl say?

i was so conditioned to be nice...i can't even think of a response to write here...months after that comment...and here is my point...why is naughty naughty? isn't it just empowerment of a sort? if naughty means mildly rude, well, that's not really for me...i don't want to be rude or mean...but if by another definition it means busting someone on bad behavior, i'm all for that...being in the moment and allowing yourself a second to consider the best, most truthful response is my kind of naughty...

a while ago, someone who had asked about my work & what i do...dismissed my work with a casual "so when are you going to get a job?" after i had told her about my busy week with the spring trunk show! nice girl listened to what this person's ideas of a "real" job were...nodded her head...and knew she was on her way to getting a migraine...naughty girl may have been able to stand up and communicate clearly that she had a "real" job...and that there were clients that depended on her...and that this response was insulting and unacceptable...i can hear the crackle of naughty girl's whip as she snaps this person to attention with her imaginary directness...(nice is so ingrained in me that just writing that sentence made me nervous...snap, crackle, and whips...if only there were a breakfast cereal for empowerment)

what i know for sure...is that nice isn't wrong...nice is good. it's...nice. i respond to nice...i wish more people were nice...if naughty equals bad behavior, i prefer nice...i am always voting for nice...the issue is that some people are not nice the way i expect or hope for them to be...there is truth to that expression "no good deed goes unpunished." and sometimes that good deed can come back to bite you in the butt...

because nice girls have a hard time saying no...they sometimes find themselves doing things they don't want to be doing...i can't tell you what these things are because then the people i did the nice things for would know that i didn't really want to be doing them but did them...to be nice ;-)
and even though i may not have wanted to do it...i do feel better when all is said and done...i just wish i could do everything that was asked of me without some other things suffering because of it...like my sanity...

so now to my favorite subject...what would our naughty and nice girls wear? even though i write girls, they are women...girl just sounds better when matched with naughty and nice...naughty women? not so much fun...nice women? boorrriiinnggg...zzzz.

naughty girl gets to wear some fun clothes...last few seasons showed a lot of black, a lot of sheer, a lot of tight, and a lot of low..there is no way you could put on anything from the above list and not feel just a little bit naughty...nice girl gets to wear all the soft colors, ruffles and prints and always looks comfortable...nothing too tight because those rosy cheeks on nice girl are a result of pleasantness, not a corseted waist...blouses with bows, dresses with buttons, pastel colors, and a cozy sweater are all worn by nice girl...i like that look...sometimes i wear that look...but i tend to like naughty clothes more than nice...i always have...maybe my inner naughty has been expressing herself through my wardrobe and shoes...i mean...even my workout clothes are black...

change is always good...if a change is going to be made...now is the best time to start thinking about it...not later...take the time to reflect on the year passed (doesn't always have to be in december) we can make our own mental movie of the year-end inventory...editing the best and the worst of the prior year...now is the time to observe the montage of what we have learned...and cutting anything that isn't working for us anymore...

i think i am going to give naughty a try...after all...maybe there's a little naughty in each of us that needs to be explored...maybe nice can be on one shoulder, halo and all, while naughty stands on the other...whip poised for action and ready to snap...

look out folks...naughty has arrived...