wanting to be held...

remember as a child...with limited vocabulary...how quickly we learned that anytime we wanted to be picked up...we could simply raise our arms...wanting to be held...and were quickly picked up? sometimes as an adult...i want to do just that...

when hard times hit...as you know they will...i find myself pleading with God for help, healing...or at a minimum...for an understanding of the hardship...during one of these times of doubt and worry...the song “held” showed up unexpectadly over my ipod...which was set on "shuffle" christian gospel music...the words pierced my heart...i quickly switched my ipod setting from "shuffle" to "repeat"...and as i listened...God comforted me with natalie grant's words...

the lyrics of the song say...“who told us we’d be rescued? what has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares? we’re asking why this happens...to us...who have died to live...it’s unfair.”

that is exactly how I felt...as somone who loved the Lord...i thought God should be taking better care of me...i doubted His reasons for the hardship...i continually cried out to Him...questioning why this was happening...why the suffering? it‘s not fair Lord!

have you been there?

the chorus of the song goes like this...“this is what it means to be held...how it feels when the sacred is torn from your life...and you survive...this is what it is to be loved...and to know that the promise was when everything fell...we’d be held...” through this simple song...God reassured me that His ways are not for me to understand...but i can trust that He loves me...His child...and is holding me close...now...every time i hear that song...my heart literally flutters...and i am gently reminded that God sees me...and loves me...despite the circumstances...

this last month has been a difficult one...for many reasons...but just yesterday...as i had my ipod set on "shuffle" christian gospel music..."held" came on once again...(completely not a coincidence...i know) the words washed over my soul as tears came to my eyes...and a peace came over me...i knew that song was God’s way of reminding me that He was still holding me tightly in His arms...it was only then...that i knew i would be okay...God was here...

if you are like me...despite our level of faith...there are times in life when we doubt if God is really watching over us or our loved ones...we question why things happen that seem unfair...we wonder what glory He could possibly derive from painful circumstances...

it takes great faith to believe that God does understand...and He wants us to know that He is always there...a song on the radio...a note from a loved one...a smile from a stranger...a powerful sermon...an applicable bible verse...God could use any method to reassure us of His love...and His omnipotence...and His desire is to hold you and me close to His heart...we merely need to raise up our arms...look into His eyes...He will...

“He reached down from on high and took hold of me; He drew me out of deep waters.” psalm 18:16